Saturday Night Live (1975)

00x574 SNL Digital Short: Seducing Women Through Chess

In an early '80s-style instructional video, a nerdy man dressed like Carl Sagan (Samberg) shows viewers how to seduce women by playing chess, but the first two women (played by Nasim Pedrad and Abby Elliott) beat him. The instructor then changes the game to checkers and still gets beaten by a woman (Kristen Wiig). He tries Jenga, but ends up knocking the tower over. He tries eating glass, but ends up scaring the woman he's trying to seduce (played by special guest Olivia Wilde). The instructor (with his lips and mouth now bandaged up) gives up and lectures on how to hire a prostitute. The prostitute (played by episode host Jason Segel) offers sex to him for $5000, but the instructor only has $60. The instructor is stabbed and robbed of his money. Before dying, the prostitute comes back and beats him at chess.

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Cast

Jim Carrey Jim Carrey As:
Julianne Moore Julianne Moore As:
Robert Downey Jr. Robert Downey Jr. As: John Cougar Melloncamp
Christopher Walken Christopher Walken As: Himself - Host
Jeff Goldblum Jeff Goldblum As: Himself - Host
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Storyline

In an early '80s-style instructional video, a nerdy man dressed like Carl Sagan (Samberg) shows viewers how to seduce women by playing chess, but the first two women (played by Nasim Pedrad and Abby Elliott) beat him. The instructor then changes the game to checkers and still gets beaten by a woman (Kristen Wiig). He tries Jenga, but ends up knocking the tower over. He tries eating glass, but ends up scaring the woman he's trying to seduce (played by special guest Olivia Wilde). The instructor (with his lips and mouth now bandaged up) gives up and lectures on how to hire a prostitute. The prostitute (played by episode host Jason Segel) offers sex to him for $5000, but the instructor only has $60. The instructor is stabbed and robbed of his money. Before dying, the prostitute comes back and beats him at chess.


Certification: TV-14

Details

Aired: 20 November, 2011 at 7:30 am

Language: English

Country: United States

Runtime: 65m

External Links

Directed By

Beth McCarthy-Miller

Beth McCarthy-Miller

Director

Dave Wilson

Dave Wilson

Director

Writing Credits

Albert Brooks

Albert Brooks

Jon Vitti

Jon Vitti

Martin Short

Martin Short

Dan Aykroyd

Dan Aykroyd

Eddie Murphy

Eddie Murphy

Bill Murray

Bill Murray

Brian Doyle-Murray

Brian Doyle-Murray

Robin Duke

Robin Duke

Steve Koren

Steve Koren

Harry Shearer

Harry Shearer

John Belushi

John Belushi

Sarah Silverman

Sarah Silverman

Billy Crystal

Billy Crystal

Terry Southern

Terry Southern

Marc Shaiman

Marc Shaiman

Michael O'Donoghue

Michael O'Donoghue

Mike Myers

Mike Myers

Jay Mohr

Jay Mohr

Christopher Guest

Christopher Guest

Phil Hartman

Phil Hartman

Jon Lovitz

Jon Lovitz

Larry David

Larry David

Dennis Miller

Dennis Miller

Adam Sandler

Adam Sandler

Jim Belushi

Jim Belushi

Mary Gross

Mary Gross

Rachel Dratch

Rachel Dratch

Kristin Gore

Kristin Gore

Andy Robin

Andy Robin

Gilda Radner

Gilda Radner

Lew Morton

Lew Morton

Tim Meadows

Tim Meadows

Robert Smigel

Robert Smigel

Chevy Chase

Chevy Chase

Andy Breckman

Andy Breckman

Adam McKay

Adam McKay

Bonnie Turner

Bonnie Turner

Terry Turner

Terry Turner

Tina Fey

Tina Fey

Writer

Tim Herlihy

Tim Herlihy

Mark McKinney

Mark McKinney

Margaret Oberman

Margaret Oberman

Andrew Kurtzman

Andrew Kurtzman

Eliot Wald

Eliot Wald

David Mandel

David Mandel

Tom Davis

Tom Davis

Writer

Jason Sudeikis

Jason Sudeikis

Kevin Nealon

Kevin Nealon

Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert

Jerry Minor

Jerry Minor

Bob Odenkirk

Bob Odenkirk

Rob Schneider

Rob Schneider

David Spade

David Spade

Alan Zweibel

Alan Zweibel

Jorma Taccone

Jorma Taccone

Writer

Al Franken

Al Franken

JB Smoove

JB Smoove

Dave Attell

Dave Attell

Brad Hall

Brad Hall

Bruce McCulloch

Bruce McCulloch

T. Sean Shannon

T. Sean Shannon

Norm Macdonald

Norm Macdonald

Joe Piscopo

Joe Piscopo

Paul Mooney

Paul Mooney

Conan O'Brien

Conan O'Brien

Barry Sobel

Barry Sobel

Garrett Morris

Garrett Morris

Tim Kazurinsky

Tim Kazurinsky

Frank Sebastiano

Frank Sebastiano

Max Brooks

Max Brooks

Rosie Shuster

Rosie Shuster

Rich Hall

Rich Hall

Dennis McNicholas

Dennis McNicholas

Don Novello

Don Novello

Writer

Terry Sweeney

Terry Sweeney

Hannibal Buress

Hannibal Buress

Christine Zander

Christine Zander

Paul Mooney

Paul Mooney

Warren Hutcherson

Warren Hutcherson

Ken Scarborough

Ken Scarborough

Steve Higgins

Steve Higgins

Writer

Harper Steele

Harper Steele

Greg Daniels

Greg Daniels

George Meyer

George Meyer

Ian Maxtone-Graham

Ian Maxtone-Graham

John Swartzwelder

John Swartzwelder

Tom Gammill

Tom Gammill

Max Pross

Max Pross

Melanie Graham

Melanie Graham

Lauren Pomerantz

Lauren Pomerantz

Pamela Norris

Pamela Norris

Jerry Collins

Jerry Collins

Colin Quinn

Colin Quinn

Joe Kelly

Joe Kelly

Anne Beatts

Anne Beatts

Writer

Terry Sweeney

Terry Sweeney

Eddie Gorodetsky

Eddie Gorodetsky

J. J. Philbin

J. J. Philbin

Robert Carlock

Robert Carlock

Bruce McCulloch

Bruce McCulloch

A. Whitney Brown

A. Whitney Brown

Alex Baze

Alex Baze

Bryan Tucker

Bryan Tucker

Charlie Grandy

Charlie Grandy

Colin Jost

Colin Jost

Doug Abeles

Doug Abeles

Emily Spivey

Emily Spivey

Erik Kenward

Erik Kenward

Herb Sargent

Herb Sargent

John Lutz

John Lutz

Kent Sublette

Kent Sublette

Patricia Marx

Patricia Marx

Paula Pell

Paula Pell

Pete Schultz

Pete Schultz

Rob Klein

Rob Klein

Sarah Schneider

Sarah Schneider

Zach Kanin

Zach Kanin

Michael Patrick O'Brien

Michael Patrick O'Brien

Matt Craig

Matt Craig

Jillian Bell

Jillian Bell

Jessi Klein

Jessi Klein

Michael Schur

Michael Schur

Leo Allen

Leo Allen

Eric Slovin

Eric Slovin

Michael C. McCarthy

Michael C. McCarthy

Bob Tischler

Bob Tischler

Marilyn Suzanne Miller

Marilyn Suzanne Miller

John Bowman

John Bowman

Peter Aykroyd

Peter Aykroyd

Matt Neuman

Matt Neuman

Josh Patten

Josh Patten

Chris Kelly

Chris Kelly

Walter Williams

Walter Williams

Matt Piedmont

Matt Piedmont

Writer

Christine Nangle

Christine Nangle

Glenn Rockowitz

Glenn Rockowitz

Heather Anne Campbell

Heather Anne Campbell

Jack Handey

Jack Handey

Jessica Conrad

Jessica Conrad

Marika Sawyer

Marika Sawyer

Paul Barosse

Paul Barosse

Shelly Gossman

Shelly Gossman

Tom Schiller

Tom Schiller

Tom Flanigan

Tom Flanigan

Ryan Perez

Ryan Perez

Dennis McNicholas

Dennis McNicholas

Hugh Fink

Hugh Fink

Matt Murray

Matt Murray

Scott Wainio

Scott Wainio

James Eagan

James Eagan

Corwin Moore

Corwin Moore

Tony Daro

Tony Daro

Jon Rosenfeld

Jon Rosenfeld

Bruce Handy

Bruce Handy

Vanessa Middleton

Vanessa Middleton

E. Jean Carroll

E. Jean Carroll

Adam Green

Adam Green

Nate Herman

Nate Herman

Kevin Kelton

Kevin Kelton

Andrew Smith

Andrew Smith

Shannon Gaughan

Shannon Gaughan

Sarah Paley

Sarah Paley

Neil Casey

Neil Casey

Tom Hymes

Tom Hymes

Cast

Production Crew

Edited By

Not currently known.

Costume and Makeup

Not currently known.

Sound

Not currently known.

Visual Effects

Not currently known.

Camera

Not currently known.

Lighting

Not currently known.

Art Department

Not currently known.

Other Crew

Not currently known.

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